Banishing boundaries bewteen straight and gay, s/m and vanilla is applauded, but it seems hard for Steinberg to grasp the idea that there are people who straddle the line between appreciating the sexual freedoms our parents didn't have and feeling nostalgic for a time when it was OK to only want one partner at a time, monogamously, indefinitely, with kids, soccer practice and the whole nine yards. That there are people who are bisexual, vibrator-owning, supporters of gay marriage who still don't want to see sexuality completely removed from the realm of the private. That this doesn't make me by default a right-wing, Fundamentalist Christian Republican.

If you don't want to create boundaries, discarding traditional stereotypes of progressive and conservative is as good a place to start as any. Recognize that sexuality is large and complex, and my degree of comfort or discomfort with others' beliefs and inclinations does not define me politically or socially as your supporter or opponent.
Christine

12/31/99 1:24 PM

Teri
Teri Voss
teril@uniserve.com
12/26/99 7:46 AM

I am in the later half of Stiffed and find that many of the things that Fauldi says in her book is acurate. The book is not out there to find those people that are forging a head in their remade selfs but to understand what is going on with the average man. It is interesting to read that the same thoughts I have had in the past regarding ways to become a man are echoed in those pages. Also very evident is the common idea that men and boys do not feel or have to be tough in adversity. It is a common for men not to share their emotions with each other while women to women interaction occures often.

I think that ones actions should come with resposibility and can not be excussed by the poor upbringing that a person has had. Still many of these men that Fauldi talks to seem (at least to me) to be in their late forties and early fifties and have no role models to follow. The entertainment industry (read Hollywood) still pumps out the sexy and goodlooking as the winners, whle it is only in the art films (read euopean) that one does not get caught in that trap.

I think Men want to be "sexy" as well as women but so often to be sexy you have to be like a celluloid character which is hollow and has no direction.

I think you have also missed Fauldi's message or answer. I believe it to be a return to becoming useful to a community and to become connected to those people who you work with and live around. You guys missed that in the book and I would suggest it is the most important point. I would also suggest tthat the one thing that I saw was that many of the men she talked with were not being honest with themselves which is another must do.

My suggestion is to keep reading but don't expect to be spoon fed the answer like a television show spoon feeds its audience. Sorry but this book takes some work by the reader and when you put something into an activity you are likely going to get something out of it.

Cheers and Merry Christmas
Guy

Guy Buller
gbuller@sprint.ca
12/25/99 6:18 AM

Sorry about that!

Mary Anne Mohanraj
editor@cleansheets.com
12/22/99 3:57 PM

Granted, the over-achieving wife is presented as a stereotype. In my view, that's the major flaw in the film. Still, I can't see how anyone could imagine the film endorsing irresponsible male empowerment as anything more than a way out for one individual. One need look no further than next door to see an exceedingly dark side of male empowerment.

Anyway, it was good to see a piece of mainstream work reviewed in Clean Sheets and, even if I didn't agree with everything Daniel Blue said, I appreciated the intelligence of the way he presented his opinions. As a critic myself, I can attest that being articulate about your reactions is about 99% percent of the battle all by itself.
Richard Todd
richard@magi.com
12/15/99 10:09 AM

What a beautiful story..brought tears to my eyes. Thank you Julia, looking forward to reading more in the future.

Warmest regards,
Audrey
Audrey H
audrey_girl@hotmail.com
12/10/99 7:31 PM

L.
sunshyn63@hotmail.com
12/5/99 6:15 PM

I am sending $10 just to access the additional stories by Daniel James Cabrillo in the archives.

Lone Eagle

12/3/99 11:13 AM

I really liked Troy by Julia Peters very much. It is very satisfying and pleasurable to explored so tenderly the sensual, imperfect perfection of the relationship she describes.

You are right, of course, it happens so rarely. Nice to see such a happy ending (or stopping point, at any rate).

Kisses,
Gary
Gary K

12/2/99 8:08 PM

First, to Leaper: While I wouldn't be surprised if we wrote more about the subject down the line, I should say that there's an article on fellatio in the archives.

Okay, now that I've gotten the blatant plug out of the way...

To Ajit:

A limerick's worth can be shown
Not in laughter or praise, but in groans.
If you liked my spirit,
I'm quite thrilled to hear it,
So thanks for your "terrible" moan!
Raymond Sullivan

11/15/99 1:03 AM

I am a bottom and I've lived with my top for about a year. We're very in love and well past the fantasy stage. I shared Jane's article with her and we both laughed almost to the point of tears because everything she said is so true! Thanks for a wonderful moment in the world of S&M reality.

Diane
GabrielleLouise@aol.com
11/08/99 6:06 PM

A well-travelled lady acquaintance always maintained that oral sex without a moustache is like an egg without salt
Andrew Ruddle

11/07/99 1:52 AM

Regarding your status as non-parents, I think you have every right to speak knowledgeably about children. I'm not a parent either, and I used to stand back when parents would remind me that I couldn't possibly understand children.

But what I finally realized was that while I did not have experience with parenthood, I certainly have plenty of experience with childhood. So if the subject of discussion is parenthood, I'll stand back. But if the subject is childhood, I'm in.

Thanks for your wonderful magazine.

Ellen Young
Ellen Young

11/06/99 10:14 AM

There are two ways to get a password. Anyone who has contributed a piece that is in the archives is entitled to a password as long as the piece remains archived. To get your complimentary contributor password, just send an email to editor@cleansheets.com, remind us that you're a contributor, and ask for access.

For everyone else, the cost is $10.00 for six months of access, or
$15.00 for one year of access (U.S. dollars only, please). For the
moment, we can't accept credit cards, so please make your check
out to Mary Anne Mohanraj, and mail it to:

Clean Sheets Magazine Archives
P O Box 1693
Dubuque, IA 52004-1693

Include your name (or some name we can call you) and an email
address where we can send the password. We will probably be
periodically changing the password, so keep us up to date if your
email address changes.

Thanks so much for helping to support Clean Sheets -- your contribution to the archives will enable us to continue purchasing
new material for the magazine. Enjoy the ever-growing archives!

Fine print: The pricing for archives subscriptions may change, and we don't guarantee that your subscription will renew at the same price. We also can't refund subscriptions once you've purchased them, and the subscription is not transferable.

Your e-mail and other contact info will, of course, remain confidential.

Brian Peters, Managing Editor
CSMagMail@netscape.net
11/05/99 6:24 AM

I read your editorial at Clean Sheets and I noticed that burning, full feeling one's eyes get when they don't want to acknowledge an inner emotion. The phrase 'touch starved' got to me. Such an apt observation. I used to live on the pacific coast, right on the beach. I loved the place. I moved to the south for a few years, married, had a child, divorced. Now I'm where my mother lives, where I vowed never to return again -- the midwest. I've been here two years and I still can't believe I live here.

I have a man I have occasional sex with in a nearby City. I date him, I suppose. We spent my birthday together. He's considerate, but guarded. There is no impetuous hot passion. There is no longing and that sweet breathlessness that you sometimes get in that space of mutual desire. He's at that stage and dangerous age where I think he fears but longs for intimacy and commitment. Is she the one? What if I say yes and it isn't her after all? Maybe it's her instead? Or her?

Perhaps a good guideline is to never sleep with any man who is never-married, over forty, and who drives a Porsche. Although I've never had better between the sheets. Technically. It's not him, it's me. He leaves my soul untouched. I'm touching, touched and touch starved all at once. Loneliness is a constant, albeit unwanted, companion.

Emily

10/22/99 4:09 PM

I'm a fan of exceptional writing, and exceptional erotic writing...well...(tremble...)
mirla criste
mirmaid@chickmail.com
3/29/99 10:14 PM

~Christina
Christina
Xpi6tiva@aol.com
2/21/99 3:16 PM

From the erudite [a fascinating discussion of the erotic elements in Christina Rosetti's "Goblin Market"] to the delightfully down and dirty [Puck gone mad in "Midsummer Night's Dream";] I've been consistently pleased with the quality of work you guys put up.

I just read the Paul Verlaine poem, Pensionnaires--very elegant verse--and it left me with a quick question. Who translated it?

I'm not familiar with Verlaine's work, but I've heard his name, and I'm assuming, since he was a French poet, that the original is in French . . .

Also, though I don't read French, I prefer to read translations alongside the original. That's not so hard to do with poetry, due to its condensed nature, and it can shed a lot of insight into the poem, as well as teach us something about the nature of the language we speak and the way it shapes our thought.

Keep up the good work guys!
Everett Wilson
EzEv444@aol.com
1/27/99 5:27 AM